BENIGN..... All Systems Go.. Cleared for Take Off!

WHOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today is a new day, a new dawn, a new start with a brand new gift...... the gift of BENIGN... the sweetest words a girl could hear.... Oh ya baby!!!

All day yesterday, my stomach was in knots, my chest was tight, I was nervous, anxious, scared to death to be perfectly honest even though I knew in my heart what the results were going to be... I have too much good stuff to do in this world to help others...... this was not going to happen to me... pray... pray harder.... close my eyes and draw on all the prayers and good thoughts from so many caring people..... I did!!! I did!!!

I took my time getting ready, put a new bed spread set on my bed so I would come home to a nice fluffy new bed..... I pulled out my high black boots, new purple and black skirt never worn, my jewelry.... mostly pink..... and dressed right up... felt good..... I always feel better when I am dressed up.... and off we went... waited and waited as he is a popular doc and his waiting room was full..... that's ok...

Dr A walked in smiling.. one word..... BENIGN..... the sweetest words a girl can hear... say it again....... Ossie cried and I danced!!!

It's the day after... here I am in the same pink robe, same jammies, new pink coffee cup Wanda bought me, with my puppy laying on my lap..... same glasses..... but............ something has changed... something not very noticeable.... but significant none the less....

I no longer have this impending doom hanging over my head... that black cloud has lifted..... this is weird.... I called my mom & dad, my daughter-in-law to be, Julia, Val.... and screamed into the phone...... Yvette called me and screamed into the phone.... Ann-Marie yelled over BBM.... we got home to my son standing here... went to Julia's and celebrated over Indian food and wine... loads of wine.... we cried alittle and laughed alot....

Ok, now what.... today I will continue to celebrate............ I will walk with my head up, back straight.... for 3.5 months I have unraveled slowly... ok not so slowly... now I need to tie it all back up again somehow... pick up those pieces and write my heart out so that I can help others who have gone through what I have..... and come out on this side ok..... alittle worse for wear maybe..... but BENIGN..........

So, at this point I will enjoy today, battle wounds and all.... just enjoy today..... bask in the BENIGN................. savour the moments..... be ordinary and extraordinary all at the same time.... float.............. with happiness..... with lightness....... I won't say a new sense of anything because I don't have a clue how I am gonna feel about anything beyond to today...

What I know today...... the anesthetic is still working it's way out.... it's gonna take a few more weeks of that.. and that is perfectly ok!!!! the wound is healing and I am all good..... all good...

So girls whose in for a tattoo....... tiny pink ribbon with stiletto on top.... signifying stomping this thing out.... on the boob... on the right boob... ya that's it!!!