But it TASTES SOOOOO GOOD!!!

Julia and I, out for an evening a few
years ago, (when this jacket fit) and
the face is still fat!

Confession time.... we went out for dinner last night to an Italian restaurant (Prego's) in Whitby.  Friends Julia & Luc joined us... (just so you know Julia is on this journey with me). The guys really wanted to try this place out and Ossie was taking me out for Valentines remember?
Well...... I did have 2 glasses of wine, but "little miss what the Hell" didn't make me do it... I did it.. I actually planned it..yup knowing it would have adverse effects on my weight loss.. seeee what I mean?  I do these things... OK that's not the worst of it.. I had bread, cheese - oh yes cheese, a deep fried ravioli of sorts (ya 1.5 of them) and a chicken thigh stuffed with cheese and wrapped in prosciutto - and of course it came with pasta.. YUMMMM... Of course, I ate it all... it's what I do..

Not the best shot ever taken on
Christmas day with my son Zak

Remember when your parents put dinner in front of you... "you must eat everything on your plate or no dessert" well trust me this fat little kid was never one to miss dessert.. I made it a mission to be the first one finished so I could pick the biggest piece of dessert over my brothers.. I did the same thing to my boys.. cycle continues...

That cycle has to stop now... I have to consciously focus on eating just enough or I will just snarf it right down...

My big one Justin at Christmas

I worry about it, I worry about tonight's dinner, it is constantly on my mind... I want something good.. I consider something good bad... hmmm is this because of the dessert thing... you have to eat the beans so you can have the good stuff... oh wait a minute.. I might have something here... so I eat my good breaky, I eat a healthy lunch (forcing it at times) but then my mind wanders to having something yummy for dinner - a huge bowl of fettuccine Alfredo, a big juicy burger with fries and gravy, something deep fried and yummy.... and bread... truck loads of bread.... I feel I deserve it, I have accomplished big things during the day you know, I have gotten all my work done and I have had a hell of a day... and for this I deserve something good or a glass of wine....

Digging up old shots - 2006 maybe
in the booth doing our radio show

Funny isn't it, the food I so deserve or that glass of wine tastes much better when I feel "I deserve it!"... OK so I have a thought here - what if I change that thinking, I deserve to be healthier, leaner and for that I will feel better going up and down the stairs or in the summer when it's hot as hell outside and I have pants on??? Hello... I deserve that!!! So why is it so tough to turn down that split second of pleasure as that yummy taste passes these lips... why oh why....

Well, one thing is for sure... I am on track and want to live my life and my life does include some dinners out and wine, yes wine... red please.. so this will happen sometimes... but being conscious of that should help me to make better choices and make those treats taste that much better...

Christmas 2011.. OK this is it! no more
fat girl!!!

So tomorrow Julia and I are taking off in the morning to do lunch and then the spa for the afternoon finally landing at her cottage for the evening and overnight.  The guys are meeting us up there and were to cook dinner... but Julia and I will have a lovely fish dinner and they can have their moose and lamb... we have thought ahead on this one... oh but the hot tub and the wine... it's for her birthday.. gotta do it...

Eat sensibly the rest of the time and a few glasses of wine won't hurt right???? Right?????

Oh and in case you wondered..... dessert.. ya a few mouthfuls passed these lips... and it was divine...